


Illicit affairs

by YouKeepMeRight



Series: Merthur a kiss a day challenge [12]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Evil Uther Pendragon (Merlin), Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:27:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26031877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YouKeepMeRight/pseuds/YouKeepMeRight
Summary: Following a post on Tumblr, I will write a story for every prompt in the list. It's my first attempt to publish something like this, but I adore these two idiots too much to not try it.Day 12: sneaking away to a hidden corner to share a secretive kiss
Relationships: Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: Merthur a kiss a day challenge [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1831621
Comments: 10
Kudos: 97





	Illicit affairs

> Make sure nobody sees you leave  
> Hood over your head, keep your eyes down  
> Tell your friends you're out for a run  
> You’ll be flushed when you return  
> Take the road less traveled by  
> Tell yourself you can always stop  
> What started in beautiful rooms  
> Ends with meetings in parking lots  
> 

Merlin was running towards the castle, breathless. The pouring rain of an unusual summer morning soaking the long blue cape he was using to cover his figure and his face. It was the same cape he had once given to his Prince to run through the citadel without being recognized. How ironic that now Merlin was the one who had to wear it! After all, he had gone up and down those streets for years, everybody knew him as the Prince's manservant. But right now _that_ was the problem. He had been exiled from Camelot, forever. _I am risking my own life, I should stop this,_ he told himself. But he couldn't. Not now.

It all began on the first day of spring. People in the castle were preparing to celebrate the day with a massive party. Everywhere there were colorful ribbons, women wore flowers in their hair and gifted them to men as a gesture of love, children laughed and sang down the streets. Merlin arrived at Arthur's chambers in a festive mood, Arthur opening the door to a grinning servant. His hair was messier than usual, little bunches of blue and red flowers stuck in his black curls.

“What the hell, Merlin?” Arthur asked, confused, eyes straying to the complimenting colors woven into his hair. They were perfect for him.

“They are ideal for the occasion, don't you think? Happy first day of spring!” Merlin answered cheerfully.

“You too, little fool,” Arthur said fondly. He couldn't help but smile in front of his friend's happiness. It had been a surprisingly prosperous winter for Camelot, and Arthur couldn't help thinking that maybe that happiness was caused by something other than peace and prosperity. Maybe those tiny moments of domesticity with Merlin were part of that happiness.

Merlin bowed his head and offered him a magnificent blue flower from behind his back, saying: “For you, my lord.”

That was the end of Arthur's doubts, and the beginning of something far more dangerous and far more thrilling.

> And that's the thing about illicit affairs  
> And clandestine meetings and longing stares  
> It's born from just one single glance  
> But it dies and it dies and it dies  
> A million little times  
> 

They kept sharing every stolen moment they could. When were among others, they were forbidden from acting upon their feelings, reduced to sharing heated glances that only a few knights dared to recognize for what they were.

Luckily for them, Merlin and Arthur knew every dark corner of the castle, every hidden wall where they could attack each other lips, Merlin pressed tightly against the wall. If those cold stones could talk, they would tell stories about the little bruises they left against the tender skin of Merlin's back, from Arthur shoving him so hard against the wall. They'd tell about the desperate sounds the two men swallowed from each other mouths, harsh whispers of “no one can hear us, Merlin.”

“I know, _oh God_ , Arthur, I know,” Merlin sobbed on Arthur's shoulder, biting his lips and Arthur's flesh. Sometimes Merlin felt those words trying to explode from his chest, like he just couldn't hold them anymore. After returning to his chambers, Merlin often cried those words in his pillow, muffling his declarations of love towards his sovereign in the fluffy cushion of his bed, whispering, “I will be damned for how much I love you,” to the ceiling of his chamber.

> Leave the perfume on the shelf  
> That you picked out just for him  
> So you leave no trace behind  
> Like you don’t even exist  
> Take the words for what they are  
> A dwindling, mercurial high  
> A drug that only worked  
> The first few hundred times  
> 

The moments Merlin hated the most were when they were in the presence of King Uther. In those moments he felt less than a man, less than a servant. Sometimes he had to pretend he didn't even exist, too afraid that a single glance at his lover would betray him.

Once, Uther told him to shut up because Merlin dared say something about a so-called honorable knight who was mistreating his young maid. In that moment all the anger and rage Merlin had to keep to himself exploded in a litany of insults against the King. In response, Merlin was flogged and imprisoned in the dungeons. At least he managed not to declare his unconditional love for Arthur.

While Merlin was in the dungeons, wounded and starving, Arthur managed to come see him without his father's guards to hear them.

“Oh my beloved, what have they done to you?” Arthur asked, kneeling in front of him, his fingers intertwined with Merlin's on the cold iron of the cell's bars.

“It's nothing compared to what I dream to do to your father,” Merlin replied angrily, his voice scratchy and dry for the lack of water.

“Here, drink this,” Arthur said, passing him a jug of water. “I understand how angry you are. I am furious, too, you have no idea! But we have to be patient, my love. One day, soon enough, everything will be fine.”

Those words were better for Merlin than every remedy Gaius could gave him.

> And that's the thing about illicit affairs  
> And clandestine meetings and stolen stares  
> They show their truth one single time  
> But they lie and they lie and they lie  
> A million little times  
> 

“I swear father, I am not lying to you!” Arthur was saying one evening during dinner while Merlin was serving wine, wishing he could add some Oleander to the King's chalice so it could stop that vicious heart.

“If you say so. I am still convinced you are hiding some beautiful woman in your chambers. I was young myself once, so I can understand. I share your sentiment,” Uther said laughing, getting up from his chair and patting Arthur's shoulder while passing behind him. The look of horror he and Merlin shared after that was one neither of them will never forget.

> And you wanna scream  
> Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby"  
> Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me  
> You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else  
> 

“We should stop,” Arthur said panting one evening when they finally managed to make love on a proper bed. The King and most of the knights were out on a hunting trip, so Arthur took advantage of the situation, spending the whole afternoon and evening rolling under the sheets with Merlin.

“What?” Merlin high pitched voice asked underneath him. Arthur was slowly grinding himself against Merlin, their skin covered with sweat and hot from the previous three times. “If you dare stop now, I am gonna bloody die here,” continued Merlin, moving his hips against Arthur's in an unmistakable declaration of intentions.

“No, not this,” Arthur growled, his face hidden under Merlin's chin. “We have to stop meeting each other in the darkest corners of the castle!”

“Why...ugh, I am so close...why are you saying that now?”

“Because...oh yes, don't stop, right there...because my father has suspicions about my behavior recently.”

“Don't you dare talk about that _bastard_ when we are...” Merlin last sentence was brutally interrupted by his orgasm, that short circuited his brain and all his rational fears. Arthur came a few seconds after his lover, shouting Merlin's name again and again, just because he could.

Their conversation about Arthur's father died there, because a few moments after Merlin was sound asleep beside him, snoring and mumbling some nonsense like: “I am red, he is blue, all I see is red and blue together, painted like a beautiful dusk”. Arthur smiled and closed his eyes beside him.

From the other side of the closed door, unheard footsteps walked away.

> Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby"  
> Look at this idiotic fool that you made me  
> You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else  
> 

“How could I be so stupid!” Merlin was shouting, kneeling among the blue _Hyacinthoides non-scripta_ flowers in a clearing in the middle of the forest.

That morning, the King stormed inside Arthur's chambers, finding him and Merlin still asleep, naked and embraced. The knight that Merlin had accused of mistreating his maid had overheard them the previous night and gone straight to the King. He was now smirking behind Uther, content with his revenge. 

“I knew there was something wrong, I just couldn't imagine...with a servant boy! You are a disgrace to me, Arthur!” Uther snarled against them. “Now get dressed and meet me in the council room in a minute, the both of you!”. He went out, slamming the door behind him.

Arthur and Merlin arrived downstairs, terrified but ready to face their destiny together. All the members of the high council waiting for them.

“Arthur Pendragon, I declare that you'll live the rest of your days alone in the highest tower of this castle, with no company but books about the nobility of man”.

“Father...” Arthur tried to say, but the King wasn't looking at him, his eyes full of hatred focused on Merlin.

“Merlin Hunithson, you have somehow changed my son's mind. I don't know if by sorcery or some kind of potion. I despise you so much that sentencing you to death seems to me like a kindness. No, I want to see you suffer, I want you to wonder around these forests alone and heart broken. I want to inflict on you a pain far more terrible than dying. You are exiled forever!”

“NO, father please, I can't...” Arthur grasped Merlin's arm. He wasn't ready to say goodbye, he could never say it to the man he loved. But the guards were already taking Merlin away, there was no point in fighting anymore.

“I'll speak no more, not until I'll see you again. My language is now made only for love, and only for declaring my love to you I'll speak again,” was Merlin last promise before he disappeared behind the doors.

Arthur's heart-wrenching cry was the only answer Merlin received.

> And you know damn well  
> For you, I would ruin myself  
> A million little times  
> 

When Merlin had received Arthur's letter, he couldn't believe it. How had he managed to write something and to send a servant to search for him in the forest? Wasn't he imprisoned in the highest tower of the castle? He was scared it could be another trap, another way for Uther to humiliate him, but he needed that little bit of hope so much.

So he decided to follow the instructions: he covered himself with the cape in order to not be recognized and entered Camelot just after dawn. He was surprised to find it quite empty, a bit more in disarray than usual. At the door that Arthur indicated to be the right entrance, a knight was waiting. Merlin was so determined to see his lover once again he was prepared to kill every person who dared to stop him. He just didn't care anymore.

“Merlin! Is that you?” the knight asked to the approaching figure of the sorcerer.

Merlin didn't answer, he only raised his hands, ready to conjure magic.

“No, wait, I am here by order of King Arthur!” the knight exclaimed.

Merlin lowered his arms and looked at the knight in disbelief.

“I'll tell you everything while we go upstairs,” the knight said, friendly, half hugging Merlin. “My name is Gwaine, by the way.”

On their way upstairs, the funny knight with long hair, who seemed the kind of man who can flirt with every living creature, explained to Merlin what had happened: there had been an insurrection between the knights. One of them, that bastard who had accused the young prince, had plotted to kill the King and take the throne of Camelot. So he did, but his kingship lasted just a few days. A small group of knights wanted the rightful heir to the throne and freed Arthur from the tower. With his support, (and with the help of the greatest part of Camelot's citizens, who had always been very fond of the young prince) they managed to kill or imprison the traitors, proclaiming Arthur the new King of Camelot.

“There he is,” Gwaine said opening the doors of the throne room. In the middle of it stood a crowned blond deity, looking even more handsome than Merlin remembered.

“A-Arthur,” Merlin whispered in a trembling voice. He wasn't sure his voice could be trusted again, but it seemed his magic had bound with his promise to Arthur, giving him just now the chance to speak again.

“My beloved Merlin, you are here,” Arthur said, opening his arms to welcome his other half. “I've missed you so much. My father tried to make me change my mind, forcing me to read books about the integrity of man, and how they can overcome their deviant behavior. But I knew my mind had nothing to be changed, because it's connected with my heart and they both belong to you. My whole body and soul belong to you.”

“As mine belong to you,” Merlin replied in Arthur's ear, his face resting on his King shoulder, his features relaxed as they haven't been in a long time.

“I love you, Arthur Pendragon, my king, my destiny. And I'll always will.” Merlin promised, lost in the blue of the other man's eyes, before sealing his last promise with a heart-stopping kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, you have to blame good old Taylor Swift for this. Hope you all are enjoying this series of fics as much as I do. The one who is not enjoying them is probabily my beta, who is a saint to keep up to my terrible use of the english language XD Joking, I adore you, @mother-of-lions ❤︎


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